The miraculous technology of the World Wide Web allows me to whine to the entire world.
So yesterday I had an appointment to take my car into see the car Dr. I wake up on time. I get there on time which is unusual for someone like me. Of course this was not going to be routine. Why? Simply because whenever, I am on time that spells trouble trust me. The guy at the counter bombarded me with dumbass questions like “Are you from around here?” As if. I replied no, but I should be because your service sucks. And the reason it sucks so bad is because everyone from around here is either to dumb and affraid to point this out. Or are all simply on permanent vacation so they have time to waste. Then he follows up with “How you did you find us”? Well I opened up the telephone book and called the first number my lil’pinky landed on, and you were the lucky ones. The integration ensues to where Einstein says: “What’s wrong with your car?” Nothing! Since you and I actually never met before I wanted to take this opportunity to meet you here and now. Instead I said: Well Mr. if I knew I would be behind that counter asking the questions and not you. This should never have come in the form of a question. I am here not only because I drove 35 minutes out of my way to get here but also because it’s your freaking job to take my car and tell me what is the matter. No. He wants to have a friendly chat. At this point I announce I will wait outside. I grab my keys and walk out the door. While I’m outside the owner arrives. I said lets go for a drive. He obliges me. Awesome!!! We arrive back my car immediately goes up on the hoist. Around 20 minutes later he calls me into the garage to point out all that is wrong with the twisted piece of metal and fibreglass box I drive. He says this needs fixing…that needs fixing…and those need to be replaced…blah blah blah. Kool fix it. No we can’t. We have to order all the parts and we can’t use old parts they must be new. I’m kool with that too. You know why? After that hit and run accident I had and the schmuck was caught the Insurance Company agreed to fix everything. So now I have to bring my car back on Tuesday and leave it for an entire day. Which entails planning and I really do not plan much, I just let things happen naturally. I really dislike cars, and driving in general. In fact, I loathe it. So bear with me as I detail my reasons…
• Now, Driving is wasted time - I don't learn anything, I don't get out of the car any better of a person than when I got in.
•Driving is stressful public transit, I feel is much better.
• Sitting in a car is bad for you. I hate being cooped up. Human bodies need to move, and poorly designed car seats only make our bodies hurt more. I can't stretch with both arms or twist my spine around, or I'll die.
• Driving demands all your attention - I can't read a book or take a nap while I'm driving or I'll die. Both of these are much more productive activities.
• Any small diversion of attention, like changing the radio station or yawning, can result in death. Who wants to die for a yawn? The consequences seem all out of proportion to the benefits.
• Cars pollute. They stink and they make walking down the street a miserable experience.
• Cars detract from my freedom. I have to service this thing regularly, feed it gas and oil, etc. It's like I'm the slave to the car. Not to mention the thousands of dollars per year to keep it running.
• Cars have contributed to the suburbanization of society, and the resulting sense of alienation that people feel. People drive home directly from work, into their automatic garage, into their house. They lock the doors, close the windows, and then wonder why they are lonely.
• Cars detract from my ability to choose. There are places that if I want to go there, I *must* drive a car. Why am I forced to do something I don't like?
Have you ever noticed the huge fraction of society's resources that goes to service the automobile industry? Look at the number of car commercials on TV and on the radio. Look at the vast amount of land space given to gas stations, repair shops, roads, parking lots, etc. Look at the huge amount of time people spend driving and servicing their cars. Mihaly Csikszentmihaly would call cars a memetic parasite, something that feeds off the effort and attention of human beings. Cars are so dangerous. Whenever someone dies in a plane crash, there's a huge public outcry for the FAA to spend millions of dollars pouring over regulations, investigating, etc. Yet every year many thousands of people die in car crashes in the Canada alone! And no one seems to care. What's going on here? How have we been so thoroughly duped? Anyone know of a good honest Mechanic? That's next...
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